Clock Blockers Time Sheet---2
Just Another Day

TomeClock.jpg“But, what I don’t understand is…” Private Mynutts had to pause his question to duck a Mourning-Wood arrow shot from across the huge Library by a scantily clad Indian bodybuilder from Seigfried and Roy’s Warband. It THUNKED dully into the rotting bookshelf where his head just was.

“Lady Del’Rolexx is an Apostle of the Goddess of Time. Why is she, us all in fact, in this forgotten hellhole putting our lives on the line to get this scrap treasure? It’s like we’re fighting each other like coyotes over decayed mouse parts. She should be holding Midnight Mass at the platinum temple of Serkzes like the rest of the Apostles. We should be with her doing that. Not this!” Private Mynutts along with his fellow Infantryman chugged along the rows of books right up to the 100 foot deep crack in the floor with lava down below. They hunkered down as a echoing roar of a Frost Bear could be heard above the screams of young girls from the south.

“Sue petitioned the Goddess to come here.” Private Daytyme replied as he nonchalantly plucked a tome from the rack, glanced at it’s incomprehensible cover then tossed the 1000 year old book into the lava and watched it burst into flames halfway down.

“She stated it’s not the stuff the gold buys or the power of the items in this place, but their age. Back at the Crypt she has a way to use these ‘Scraps’ as you call them and go into a trance to regress her vision back to the ancient time when these things were first wrought. From those visions she says she can ‘Post-re-engineer’ all this stuff” He looks at Mynutts with wide eyes and a smile one only gets from knowing the secret of a winning team.

“But…” Just then Private Mynutts head exploded in a phantasmagoria of lightning and blood.

His decapitated corpse squatted there for a few moments, as if it didn’t know how to act in this new development of the situation. Then it collapsed. From the area of the Rivendell Warband came a hoot of victory and a peel of giddy girl laughter. Private Daytyme slammed his back to the book rack then put his shield before him in a defensive manner with one hand and started wiping the blood spray from his face with the other.

“Hey…Over here…Private.”

Private Daytyme looked to the hailing call, He saw an arm lurched over the lip of the lava crack. He scuttled on his belly to the scene as another Elemental Bolt shot across the chasm. He grabbed the intensely hot armoured arm and pulled. It was Sir Pendulum covered in cooling rock smegma.

I saw you pushed into the lava crack by one of Seigfried’s treasure hunters! You fell 100 feet into frigging lava!” He exclaimed.

“Yeah, that WAS a bitch. Come on, let’s get the fuck outta here.” Sir Pendulum (not one to use gutter talk lightly) said in a hoarse voice. He and the Private leaned on each other as they slowly followed the receding backs of their fellows.

January- 9th, Saturday
'The Library'

A sheaf of ice slid off a section of the city revealing a few entrances to an underground Library. As fate would have it 3 Warbands were alert enough to the opportunities that laid in wait.

Siegfried and Roy‘s Warband sashayed in from the southwestern staircase.
Rivendell’s Bikini Team bounced in from the southeast.
The Clock Blockers punctually entered from the north.

The battle lasted 3 and a half hours. A Clock Blocking knight was pushed into a 100 foot deep crack of lava by one of Siegfried’s treasure hunters. A enthusiastic throng of girls ran westward to attack Siegfried and his band of merry men causing them to drop a treasure chest. A hungry Cave Bear shambled into the fray only to be quickly beaten down by the Rivendell Team. It was then tied, groomed and named ‘Huggums Wuggums’. One treasure chest went unclaimed. Siegfried was killed by Ellowan’s elemental magics, as was the Apprentice B’Quikk.

Siegfried (now just Roy the Apprentice who badly tore his pink sequin jumper) skipped away with 3 hard wood chests of books and 3 dead.
Ellowan made out like a pimp with 4 Treasures full of sticky magazines and only two dead.
Del’Rolexx ran out of time with only 1 Treasure chest filled with books and six team mates dead (nine if you count the suicidal zombies).

Posters around town (2)


January- 3rd, Sunday
"The Keep"

Four Warbands conducted furious battle withing the ruins of an old, decrepit Keep. Although it’s walls had crumbled, it’s mystical teleportation disks were still very active, much to the chagrin of anyone stepping upon one.

Siegfried and Roy decended on the Keep from the North.
Bob’s Magical Mystery Tour came in from the East.
The Cabal of Best Supporting Cast crawled up from the South and
Slickraven slunk in from the West.

The battle lasted 4 hours and 10 minutes. The clash of steel and the lamentations of the fallen drew the attention of a autonomous, penis shaped, vibrating construct and 2 rats of enormous size that added to the confusion of melee. Bob’s archers gained a commanding view of the action from atop a burnt-out tower, but it was Slickraven herself who drew first blood as she successfully Struck Dead the wizard Siegfried ( it was noted that as he died he was to say “You S-th-lattern whore! I’ll scratc-th your eyes out nex-th-t time!”). Towards the end, Bob and the Cast had a central blood-pit duel over the last two treasures which were eventually ripped into pieces and scattered about. No wizard was stupid brave enough to step onto the tele-disks and gain experience as to it’s workings.

Roy (at least) left with 3 fancy treasure chests, but with four teammates and two expensive show-cats dead, it was a Pyrrhic victory at best. The team then squatted in a unique fixer-upper and decided to start a Bed-and-Breakfast called The Freeman’s Arms

Bob exited with 2 chests of mystery and one corpse. He discovered a site later on in the day that could be refurbished into a Brewery of sorts, so he set his team to the task of furbishing.

The Cast ran off with 2 heavy treasures supported between them. They all wept effusively during the post-production party over the loss of a Summoned Snow Leopard. Eventually they re-grouped at their base, a treasury that used to be inhabited by a clan of Frost Giants.

Slickraven flew back to her Laboratory with 3 chests of gold and three dead barbarians (ie…lunch)

Slickravens Log---- 1
Dinnertime in the Ruins

TomeSlickraven.jpgTHINGS I HAVE ATE_

Apprentice Liver with sautéed chives and white wine
Gained 200 Gold coins. Note to self, I have more chives and wine, Must try to lure other Warbands’ Apprentices to join me for dinner.

Ghoul toes on a bed of crisp Trent leaves
Must thank Aberlimeninan (?) for summoning the Treant for my men to kill. I have made a kitchen in my new Laboratory I have made into my Base. I then sold Rings for cash.

Skull Bone Stew toped with parmesan cheese
As one of my Nameless Barbarians was running away he was attacked by 3 Skeletons from a Mausoleum. They each missed him and he killed each one in one round. I guess I should name him.. later. I now hired 4 new Barbarians to replace the 1 that died.

Flaming Frost Rat in a Bourbon-Tomato Cream Sauce
Found this little morsel in the ruins of a Keep, also gained enough gold to totally max out my Barbarian hoard. Killed a Wizard with just a look!! Must sell some of this crap.

December- 29th, Tuesday (later)
The Mousoleum

Rumor had it that there was ancient treasure to be found at a newly thawed out grave site, a Mausoleum. Investigating this were two Warbands who, although fought viciously this very morning and had wounded party members, both needed the gold and experience to survive this deadly city.

Abramelin’s Crew crept up from the South.
Slickraven and her band came from the north.

The battle lasted two hours, well into the setting of the sun. Although no wandering monsters made an entrance, the Mausoleum itself churned forth scads of skeletal minions who hampered the treasure reclamation efforts. Slickraven’s greed and hunger was her downfall, both Warbands could have gained an equal amount of treasure and have been done with it, but the cannibal barbarians charged deep into Abramelin’s area of control and paid dearly for that mistake.

Abramelin came away with 4 Chests of gold, 2 of which were of a greater amount then ever before seen and no loss of life.
Slickraven left the field with only 2 chests of large size. Four out of her five Barbarians were killed.

That night Abramelin set a giant Cauldron inside his Base to aid potion making.
Slickraven hired more nameless Barbarians.

December- 29th, Tuesday
Crossroads of Pain

In the crispy early morning Frostgrave began to awaken from it’s cold, dark sleep. The tiny ball of light jokingly called the sun rose from the East and shone its light on 3 Warbands preparing to do battle over a recently discovered pocket of treasure. Aurelia and her team by now were learned in the math equation of survival over greed. But two new Warbands were shaking from excitement (or fear) of the conflict to come.

Aurelia and Co. entered from the North of the crossroads.

Slickraven and her hungry band of barbaric cannibles entered from the East.
Abramelin’s Crew, boosted with temporary summoned fighters entered from the West.

During the battle a lowly Ghoul made its first stumbling step since its hibernation of 1000 years only to be torn apart by a barbarian. Slickravens lack of an Apprentice was a marked hindrance. The quick Treasure Hunters made light work of running to the chests then departing into the early morning mist. The battle lasted 2 and a half hours.

Aurelia, her team bloodied, lost no soldiers and exited with a kings ransom of 4 treasure chests.
Slickraven watched as 3 of her men went down only to gain 1 chest.
Abramelin witnessed the fall of most of his constructs and two of his best archers, one of whom later died of her wounds. He exited with 4 treasure chests.

Afterward Slickraven fell into an undiscovered Laboratory and began to lick her wounds. Abramelin set shop up in a place called The Lost Souls Bed and Breakfast (4.1 rating on TripAdvisor, “The Fried Rat with Potatoes was to die for…”). Also Aurelia built a kennel out back of her Inn so her she could once again bring her Warhound- Guido, back into the fray.

Clock Blockers Time Sheet---1

TomeClock.jpg“Ah, here we are. Sue is putting her face on. I’m sure she won’t mind if we pop in.” With that Jakk pulled the heavy triple layered curtain away from the sturdy tent entrance and ushered the two new armoured men inside. Although grateful to be entering a warmer, less windy place one of the men hesitates and says

“High Templar Del’Rolexx Of The Chronoguard is one of the Goddess’ most powerful apostles. Are you sure you are comfortable with just addressing her by her first name?” His steely glare bores into Jakk slightly more cold then the ever blowing wind.

“Ah, yes. You see Frostgrave…er… I mean the city of Felstad is so dangerous that if one was to warn her of a danger, by the time one states her official title, she’d be eaten. You don’t want that do you? In you go!” Jakk gives a push to the questioning knight, enters himself then closes the flap. The white outside glare is slow to fade as the three men’s eyes accommodate them selves to the dimness of the command tent. In a dark corner, the back of a 80 year old crone can be seen. She is sitting bent over a wide bowl of slightly phosphorus gel, she is naked from the waist up. What she is doing is blocked, but her shaking bony hands can be seen strapping leather-like cords around her scalp and deftly buckling the little buckles. As she stands she turns and pulls up the heavy wool dark red robe. She faces the men as she pulls the hood over her thinning white hair and says,

“Welcome to Felstad.”

The two armoured men are speechless. Del’Rolexx has a face of an Angel. So young and vibrantly full of life. Her eyes sparkle as blue as the frozen ice that surrounds the city and her voice is like a summer breeze.

“First order of business is to get you two settled in, fed and brought up to date on the situation here. Jakk will show you to your tent next to the Infantrymen and then he will bring you some Warhound Stew. Please don’t tell the others about the stew, they’ve grown far too attached to Tick and Tock. We will be making another foray into a recently thawed section of the City in 2 days. Chances are we might run in to one of the other warbands who think they have rights here. One is lead by an Illusionist and the other has an Evoker. What’s worse is we’ve recently received news that a new warband is scavenging the streets. We might have to fight them too. This deserted City is getting too crowded for my tastes.”

Aurelia's Journal--part 2
After the second battle

TomeAurelia.jpgAurelia was not happy. Even the new recruits had figured out that it was probably best not to speak with her until she was ready.

They were halfway back to The Fat Cock before she was ready.

“Well that was a complete humiliation,” she spat, venomously.

“Well it could have been a lot worse,” Brita offered with a brave smile. “We did get two treasures and no one was badly wounded in the process.”

“Two treasures. JUST TWO TREASURES! While those Rivendell Bikini Sluts got away with … how many? Four? Five? I lost count they got so many. So many of OUR treasures. Sluts. Whores. Bitches. Cheating, bitchy, slutty whores.

“At least we took at least one down. I saw her fall hard,” Brita offered. “And Eeva did really well against that huge troll.”

“Pah! Only because I lent her my magical dagger.”

“Well let’s just wait and see what we ended up with from the two treasures that we did get,” Brita concluded.

Aurelia’s mood seemed to change little after going through the contents of the two chests.

“Just 240 gold, a Grimoire of Destructive Sphere which is next to useless as it is from the Elemental School and this bloody thing.”

It took all her strength just to lift the Two-Handed Sword.

“Useless. We’d need to hire some muscle-headed barbarian to make any use of the ridiculous thing at all.”

“I am sure that we could get a fair price for it at Bob the Barbarian’s Used Magick Weapons Mart though,” Brita replied.

“Good thinking,” Aurelia agreed. “I knew there was a reason why I kept you around. Go sell it. And you may as well sell the dagger as well while you’re at it. The band has proved itself to be totally incapable of handling even the simplest of tasks and so it’s time for us to make some more sweeping changes. And that’s going to be expensive.”

“I managed to get 200 for the two-handed sword and 150 for the dagger,” Brita says proudly, handing over the money pouch.

“Good,” Aurelia replies, grabbing the purse from her. “Add that to the 240 we took, plus the 10 left in the kitty and we have 600 to spend now.”

She sneered as she looked over the warband.

“That should be more than enough to get rid of all the deadwood and replace them all with some more talented individuals who can think and act for themselves.”

The cull was indeed brutal by the time that Aurelia had finished with her hiring and firing. In fact, it left only Dagmar as the sole survivor from the first incarnation of Aurelia and Brita’s band. All three archers and both of the thieves were fired. In their places came yet another three Treasure Hunters – Renate, Saara and Terje – plus two more Rangers – Olli and Pila.

Aurelia and Brits welcomed them to the fold.

“And 160 gold left in the kitty in case we need to make any more replacements,” Aurelia whispered to Brita.


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